Rain Dance!

Unit Camp

2011-03-13T05:03:00.000-07:00

Okay. Unit Camp.

I'm glad most people had some fun...

But okay let's reflect.

My organization skills suck.

Maybe I judge people too harshly...

Maybe I need to go for anger management classes?

BUT SERIOUSLY. SOME PEOPLE ARE... ARGH.

You know sometimes you just want to reverse time and do things more dutifully?

Now would be it.

Yes. I agree there has to be some element of fun. But at other times, why can't you be more serious?

OBVIOUSLY, there has been some conflict.

What some of you did during the camp, really broke my heart.

I was disappointed. I should say, more than usual.

Reflections

2010-12-17T07:44:00.000-08:00

Christmas is coming soon.

And I'm excited for this Sunday!
Christmas party~
Sort of..

hahaha!

I don't know why..
but I'm feeling like...
in the festive mood.
haha!
OKAYYYYYYY.

That's weird..
cuz usually when Christmas comes,
I don't feel anything..

Hmmmmmmmm...

Maybe it's because,
this year,
I feel very blessed :)

Really, when I think back...
God has blessed me with a lot this year

I had a blast with my family when we went out shopping during weekends :)
Awesome extended family BBQ too!

School, to me, is like a second home.
So it's natural that my friends become like a second family :)
I'm thankful that I got the chance to meet so many wonderful people.

Through school, all my new classmates :)
Really a great bunch of people.
Teachers have helped me so much in my studies.
Your scolding me was so that I would wake up and get on with life. :)

Through NPCC, a lot more opportunities rose for me :)
Stepped up as a leader, after the seniors pass out.
Led my squadmates and juniors.
Under the guidance of caring teacher officers,
I matured :)

Through SYF, some lovely personalities.
But unfortunately, because I was feeling sad at that point in time,
I didn't exchange contacts with those who went for SYF :(
But I managed to keep in touch with some people! :D
Lessons learned. I will imply them in life :)

Through STC, the whole area got together for the first time :)
And I got to see more personalities.
and those who went for NPAP'09 too. :D

And finally in HK OEV.
Really, you have no idea how blessed I feel to be selected for this trip.
Okay, so we weren't really bonded.
But I got to bond within my own clique.
On the last night, we had a sharing session
It was a nice feeling within me.
After the chaotic commotion, we were enveloped by total serenity and bliss. :D
And really there were nice people during the trip. :)
Reflections were made, and lessons are learnt.
I had difficulty writing relections onto such a small space and within a short period of time.
But the mind can probably never forget such a significant experience.

So all-in-all,
This year, I made new friends.
This year, I didn't lose contact with some outstanding friends.
And this year, I experienced...
what it feels like to have a crush :)

It's a sweet feeling.
But I don't want to say anything else.
haha! ^^

So there! My wonderful 2010!
Significant memories etched into my mind.

Thank you, God. :)

BORING~

2010-12-09T05:44:00.000-08:00

WOOOOOOOOOOOO. BORED BORED BORED AGAIN.

There is Music Bank tomorrow!
WHEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I want to watch!

It will be my first time!
hahaha!

hmmmmmmm....

I watched 2 episodes of Danbi.
Doo Joon is inside. :D
The show was really touching!

I want to watch some more but the episodes are really hard to find.
OH WELL!
:D:D:D

Doo Joon! You've lost weight.
Because of your busy schedule.
:((((((((((((((((((((((((
EAT MORE!! :(
^^

OKAY. I'm still bored.
BLEHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
:D

2010-12-05T06:03:00.000-08:00

I'M REALLY AT A LOSS OF WHAT TO DO............

NOW THAT I'VE UPLOADED ALL THE OEV PICS ON FB.

I GOT NOTHING TO DO.

OH GOSH.

THE BOREDOM.

IT'S GETTING TO MY HEAD.

oh yeah..
I bought BEAST's Lights Go On Again Album.
It's so cool~
There's a photo album inside too!
THE PHOTOS ARE JUST DAMN AWESOME.

COOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL.

DOOJOON IS WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
MAD HOT.

OKAY I SHALL STOP IT NOW.
HOHOHOHO.

2010-12-02T22:29:00.000-08:00

IM BORED.
BORED BORED BORED BORED BORED.

I hope that duck is having more fun than me in Japan.
IRRITATING.

I GOT NOBODY TO DISTURB.
TSK.

HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM.........
On to another topic! ^^

I realised that what I'm feeling for you isn't love.
Sure, what I feel for you is strong..
But then..
Love can only exist between two parties.
It isn't one-sided.

And the fact that you're oblivious to my emotions, makes this relationship one-sided.

:D

What to do???

HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM....
What else shall we talk about?
nothing, yeah?

I WANT TO GO LOOK FOR FREE APPS FOR MY iTouch.
kay, bye.

Back from HK!

2010-11-30T19:48:00.000-08:00

As the title suggests..
I'M BACK FROM HK!!!!!!!!!!

NO MORE PLANTS.
MEAT MEAT MEAT.
AHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAA.

I should have spent more on souvenir shopping...
cuz I realised I bought very little stuff..
ehehe..

The feeling...
now that I'm back in Singapore...
has improved a bit.
Because I've seen my family..
and talked to some of my friends on msn.

BUT YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I miss you!
I wish we had more interaction...
:(

I MISS YOU, YOU KNOW??????????????
AHHHHHHHHHHH!
I'm so deprived of your smile.
:(

I really just don't know what to say...
I just...
I miss you.

Last Day before OEV.

2010-11-21T02:11:00.000-08:00

People People People!

I love everybody in this whole entire world!
OKAY?

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
Hong Kong...
In less than 24 hours...

Part of me doesn't want to go..
I don't want to leave behind my family and friends...
:(

But I wish everyone well, while I'm gone for one week!

ahhhhhhhhhhh!!!!
Sad face. Sad face. Sad face.
I need a hug before I go Hong Kong. :(((((((((((((((((((

Tomorrow is a special day for you, hmm?
You probably won't remember me when you're having such a fun night out...

AHH. DAMN IT!
I.WANT.A.HUG.FROM.YOU!
:(

Why do I feel calm after I say your name?
How is it possible for you to have such an effect on me?
Since the beginning of the year.. until now..
GOD, HELP ME!
I'm such a hopeless hopeless girl...
:(

Hmm..
Contrary to popular belief, the most used word in love letters is "miss" not "love".
People are just too thick-skinned to use the word "love".
And it's a strong word..

So...
For one week, you'll be in my thoughts
But I probably won't be in yours.

I miss you.
Even now..
I miss you.

OEV!

2010-11-20T06:19:00.000-08:00

Hmm...
I'm going overseas!
With NPCC!
To Hong Kong and Macau!

Part of me is excited!
But I can't help but feel sad because I'm gonna miss my friends :(
but just 7 days!
and then it's home sweet home!

EXCITED, YO!!!
I hope the hotel got strong WiFi signal.
so I can still keep in touch with family and friends :D

I need to strategise.. And not spend everything in one place.
DAMN! WHY DO I FEEL THAT S$300 ISN'T ENOUGH FOR THE WHOLE TRIP????

I'll be leaving on Monday.
in the afternoon?

I need to enjoy the time left I have in Singapore.
before going off into the unknown.

and off to make new friends!!!!!!! =D

^^

2010-11-06T05:21:00.000-07:00

DOOJOON AH!
>w<

kay I'm obsessed.

hmmmmmmmm....

I hope MANY MANY outings come along!
I want to go to MANY MANY outings with friends!

DooJoon!

2010-11-04T06:32:00.000-07:00

NPCC and STUDIES.

NPCC has been dominant for the past few weeks...
Because..
well, it's the holidays..

STC coming soon~~

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...
I'm bored.

2010-10-16T23:47:00.000-07:00

And again..
this blog is the only place where I can truly just be myself.

I'm just being too sensitive..
right?

The group of you, out of all friends, would have thought about me too right?
Did I come across your mind?

If I didn't...
That would reflect on how bad a friend I might have been.

I guess I feel out of the circle..
Like as if I'm a stranger to you..

Did I do something wrong?
Was I being too informal to the point that I became rude..
and..
upset or angered you?

Aishah.. Aishah...
Damn. Why do I keep hurting the people I care about the most?

I'm at such a loss at what to do now...
and out of all people..
I gave you the cold treatment..

I'M SORRY!

God! Why am I so rash?

Sometimes I think people like me don't deserve to be alive..

OH DAMN IT!
I JUST WANT TO SHOUT MY FEELINGS OUT!

no.. sleep..
that's what I need..

...

2010-10-16T07:37:00.000-07:00

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

NOSEBLEED!
I'm being serious here!

I got nosebleed..
when I saw DooJoon's twitter acc!

AAHAHAHA!
I CRACK MYSELF UP!

AHAHAHAHAHAHA!

I stopped using twitter for a while...
STOP THE NOSEBLEED PLEASE!
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

XDDD

Sigh...
I can really amaze myself at how fast my moods can change.

At one point.. I'm feeling so high..
and now I feel angry?
sad?
disappointed?

Hurt actually..

I kept quiet at first..
But I found out that the whole lot of you went without me..

So..
If that's how much I mean to you...
then okay..

Fuck these moodswings...
Really!
IT'S AFTER THE EXAMS!
LET ME BE HAPPY WOULD YOU??????????

I might as well throw my social life away.
Study.
NPCC.
That's all.

Okay.. Maybe I couldn't have gone with all of you..
But no one asked..
at all..

Maybe I'm being too sensitive.

Right..
I'm going to bed.

post exam?

2010-10-16T01:57:00.000-07:00

Exams are over!

I feel the same..
haha

miserable miserable miserable.

A group that got me into my fangirl mode that I kept dormant for so long...
Until now..

Introducing Beast!!!
SOOM!

YO SEOB!

heh heh..

I'm totally posting vids like nobody's business. :P

I DON'T WANT TO GO STC!!!!!!
People are naturally scared and uncomfortable when they're put into a new environment.

And meeting the whole Area 20 for the first time...
*shy shy*
GAH. NOOOOOOOOOOO!

I'm still not used to being OIC ._.
It's like I want to take charge..
but I feel shy...
and when I don't feel shy...
People say I become bossy.

AHHHHHHHH!
What do you want me to do?
I can't help you if you don't want to help yourself.

Stop talking behind my back.
It's disgusting.
Just shoot.

I can accept critism very well.
Unless you purposely want to spite me...
I'm going to make life hellish for you.

WAH. NOW THAT I THINK ABOUT IT..
I BECOME DAMN PISSED OFF.

"OIC useless.."
=.=
I'd like to see you try and take my role.

If you think NPCC is such a slack CCA.

Then BLOODY HELL go and quit.

I don't give a damn about having a huge number of cadets in NPCC.
I don't give a damn about UOPA points.

Go on. Continue what you're doing.
See if I give a bloody rat's ass about it.

I already like you, somehow

2010-09-26T01:35:00.000-07:00

NO. I am not back from hiatus.

But.. I'm feeling rather bored.
ahaha

How come everytime I listen to love songs..
You're in my mind.
and I think solely of you..

My heart stops when you look at me.

SO GO AWAY, DAMN IT!!!
:(

Haish...
EOYs are coming and I can't stop thinking about you.
And to add on to that, my leadership position is in jeapordy.

and I still can't stop thinking about you.

Someone please tell me that
It isn't love.

I just don't know what to say anymore.
Would it be best if we didn't cross paths at all?

You're my affliction.
and my addiction.
You have the only gaze that pierces my soul.
And you're the only one that can move my heavy heart of chrome.

With a single kiss, my day is reviltalized~ a powerful pull
The second kiss, it sent a blow to my heart and it feels hot

Yeah, you got me.
But thankfully, you don't have the slightest idea.

ALALALALA. Okay. I'm too shy to continue.
So go away! Shoo shoo!

OH HEYY!!

2010-09-23T02:44:00.000-07:00

AH. I'm having mood swings...
WHEE!

I'll be on hiatus because of the upcoming EOY exams.

hah. I felt really pathetic yesterday yeah?
RAWR RAWR RAWR!
Cried my eyes out yesterday.

But all is well! :)

I wrote what I've been wanted to say to Ms Foo yesterday.
And I have asked a teacher to put it on her table today.
This is the only way for me to work hard for results.

Clearly, I am not grasping the importance of my studies.
I wonder how Ms Foo will react when she reads my letter.

Haish..
You're hopeless, Aishah.
Nothing good has ever come out since you became OIC.
Is it time for me to step down?
and hand my duties over to someone more capable?

But don't say I didn't try.
I'm giving myself one last chance.
And I hope Ms Foo gives me one last chance as well.

Tch..

You people doubt my abilities so much right?
Fine. I'll make you happy.
Replace me with someone more capable then.

THAT'S RIGHT.
I'M WEAK.

Whatever. This is the last straw.

I don't want to embarrass the unit anymore.
I don't want Kranji NPCC to fall in my hands.

Hari Raya!

2010-09-10T05:30:00.000-07:00

Alright peepos!

This shall be a very happy blog post!
As I realise that the previous ones were....
hmmm...
angsty, yeah?

The first day of syawal was todayyyyyyyyyy!
HOORAY PEOPLE! HARI RAYA AIDILFITRI!

YEAH! Let's celebrate!
We've completed one full month of fasting!
woohoooooooo!

okayyy..
I felt a bit sad at the beginning of the day..
But I felt really happy as the day progressed :)

Cried quite a lot...
Thank goodness I decided not to wear eyeliner today :D

YEAH YEAH! I must pace myself when eating.........

hehe..

but.. no pics for now..
because I didn't take PEEKTURES!

Let's wait for my cousin to post some pics.
then I shall put em up here..
God willing. :)

All in all, I had a good time today!
Visiting relatives and asking for forgiveness :)

To tell you the truth, my mind wasn't on the green packets today!
haha!
I stuffed my bag with lots of stuff!
then I realised in the taxi..
OH POO.
How am I supposed to put in green packets?

I think I've matured in my way of thinking ;D
*wink wink*

hahas! okayyyyyyyy.
I shall end my post here!

Selamat Hari Raya! Maaf zahir dan batin! :D

Ignite the passion!

2010-09-08T03:25:00.000-07:00

:D

There was NPCC today!
:o

I feel damn shagged.
Thank goodness there wasn't any pegging today :D

So, from 8 today, went for training, we learnt PT drills
and the knots for tent-pitching.

After that, we went down to the science block to pitch our tents.
N level examinations were going on, so we couldn't go to our usual campcraft spot.

They planted trees there...
=.="
The next campcraft team will have a hard time :(

Campcraft tee!
Same design as last year...
but it's BLUE! :D

and no crest.. so we can wear it as and when we like
HOORAY!

A lot of happy things happened during training today! :3
I am happy! >:)

Hmm.. I just realised..
that tomorrow is the last day of the fasting month.
:o
HOHO.

Right then, after the fasting month ends,
or after hari raya,
I shall go all out with my studies and NPCC.

I feel damn shagged during the fasting month.. cannot drink WATERRRR.
During trainings somemore! Lose a lot of water leh!!
then see other people drink water...
*_____________*
Can I have some?

haha! JK!

Believe it!
Ignite your passion for STUDIES and NPCC!

:)

2010-09-07T02:21:00.000-07:00

OH GOSH.

Seriously! I feel so worn out.

AHHHH! I just don't know what to feel.
And when I don't know what to feel,
I freak out!

but..
One thing is for sure..
My feelings for that...
that...
guy...
Did they just grow stronger???
:(

GAH! I don't want this! Really!
but because of you, damn it! I feel weak!

Can you... stop.. exhausting my emotions?
One week without you...

wait!
SEE SEE! There I go again!
WHY?
Why am I so obsessed?
Am I just weak?
Or are your boyish charms too powerful for me to overcome?

How I yearn to call your name..

in such an adoring fashion...

So imbued with affection..

But instead I call you s_____

Simultaneously, there is two of me.
One who speaks the truth but is weak.
and another who tells lies in order to stand strong.

It's NOT love!

But then again..

I just feel like saying...

I love you, yeah?

2010-09-05T03:08:00.000-07:00

Don't give me that kind of shit.

How many trainings already?
And there is NO PROGRESS.

TCH. I am in NO MOOD. To entertain your nonsense.

HAHA! You're probably going to lie to me,
or give me some lame excuse
as to why you didn't come for training.

ENOUGH OF THIS SHIT.
CADET LEADERS ALREADY.
Pon training.
AM I PROUD OF YOU OR WHAT?

hahaha. okay. Enough of this shit from me.
Do whatever you deem fit.

2010-07-28T04:46:00.000-07:00

When I sprained my ankle in SYF,
Do you know how disheartening it was to see you with your other friends.
Do you know how hurt I felt when you left me limping pathetically from place to place?
Do you know how sad I felt when I was reminded of this squadmanship we have?

What to do?
I was angry at first.
but now, I'm just worried. For both of you.
I myself can't make a strong enough impact.
I need a whole group of people to change our cadets' lives for the better.

People are assets.
People with skills are useful.
People with passion are the ones who succeed in life.

I value the both of you.
And the talk that I had with you, was just so that you could improve on yourself.
I'm sorry if it was too direct.

But what you're giving me right now,
Do you think you deserve to be called a Cadet Leader?

Wake up.

2010-07-17T22:11:00.000-07:00

I felt the need to post about this.
And it is of utmost importance to me,
I'll post this seperately from the previous post.

What do you feel now?
Now that you're already cadet leaders?

Can you feel the power running through your veins?
Doesn't it feel good?

I can understand. I feel it too.
But there is a limit to everything.
And that includes my patience.

I'm still trying to balance out welfare and discipline.
And I do not expect some wanna-be to take my role.

Yes. I might sound domineering here. but it is my only right to do so.
You were given a role in the hiearchy as well.
And I expect you to do yours. Not mine.
Don't be some nosy hero and think you're the best.

Yes. You're drills are good.
but is there a need for that fucked-up attitude?
I don't expect you to take control of something that is already in control.
If you wanted my post so badly. Then you would have put up a fight for it.
What now? I didn't even break a sweat against you.
and now, you're desperately trying to get whatever you want.
STOP. Being a sore loser.

Some of us have already taken note of your despicable behaviour.
That makes you all alone then.
Unless you count that bimbo to be on your side.
Huh. Yeah. That bimbo who usually gives in to everyone else.
So honestly, what kind difference do you think you can make?
1 person against the entire unit. Is that how you want things to go?

Just who do you think you are?
Just because you went for some big shot event and I didn't.
That doesn't mean that you are the least bit better than me.
I'm not trying to say that I'm better than you either.
but really, with that kind of attitude,
You'll get blacklisted soon.

I don't want to blacklist you either.
So watch it. I'm going to talk to you soon.
Yes. Personally. I've conquered my fear.
The fear of talking down to people face-to-face about conflicts.
Call it a confrontation, or just a heart-to-heart talk.

After I talk to you,
I just hope that you'll leave your ego somewhere else
when you talk to me, or any of the sec 3s for that matter.

I'm warning you. I have more power. More responsibility.
I'll knock you down if I have to.

:D

2010-07-17T21:54:00.000-07:00

Hmm.. My blog has been pretty dead for a while.
So yeah. I'll update it now :)

A lot of things happened during my absence.
I got kicked out of SYF.
we've taken over the unit already.
and NDP trainings in school (:

As for the SYF part. I don't really want to go into details.
It was a huge blow to me. And it distracted me from schoolwork as well.

POP was a two days ago. And the Sec 3s have finally taken over the unit!
I've got some negative feelings about this.
But nevertheless,
I am thankful towards the Sec 4s for everything they have contributed to the unit.
I seek co-operation from the Sec 3s so as to make our final year in NPCC a fruitful one.

NDP trainings! Hmm..
I got kicked out of GOH contigent again.
Slightly disappointed. but I'm neutral to the post I have now
and that is, NPCC Supporting Contigent In-Charge.

There are a lot of things to be improved on for the supporting contigents.
I must say, it was a disappointment to watch them march in.
And not only the NPCC sc, but NCC as well.
For the other UGs, I'm not so sure because I was standing in front of them.
But anyway, I've set my expectations for the sec 2 squad already.
Sec 1s, we'll see how far they can progress first.
Improvement has to be made. For both NPCC and NCC sc.
And for that to happen, I must seek the cooperation of both NPCC and NCC sc.
I'll do something about it.

Only 2 more trainings left before the real parade.
I just hope the sec 1s and 2s will cooperate with me (:
And I might consider having another training on Saturday.
Since the rehearsal this week will be on a Friday.

Let's go do our best, everyone!

2010-06-25T07:11:00.001-07:00

I'm only here because I'm bored.
I need something to do..

A lot of events happened during the june holidays.

LMSC course
PK & HFS course
SYF trainings

It's just natural instinct to solve a problem or change my mindset when I encounter a problem.
After all, what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger right?

but you know,
while trying to improve myself,
while trying to be a better person,

I think I lost myself.
I just drowned myself in all that uncertainty.

I used to think that being uncertain was okay.
It makes you think, think, think.
But I'm overwhelmed.

Really. I don't know what to think of myself anymore.

Of positions and events.

2010-05-28T02:49:00.000-07:00

Right..

I tried using livejournal for the past few days.
and I don't like it.

Seriously.

Heh.
Ok let me blog about stuff that I mentioned in livejournal but not here...

Teacher Officers posted me to the Overall-in-charge.
WAHHHH.
I feel honoured.

_____________________________

Lots of events going on during june hols.
and holiday homework X_X
I think I should start tomorrow.

Cultural Fiesta Night clashes with SYF preview.
OMG.
LIKE... WHAT?????
TT_TT
_____________________________

OH! OH! and another thing!
My TO suggested we have informal trainings with the sec 4s.
She suggested that we role play.
The sec 3s become Cadet Leaders.
The sec 4s become Cadets.
AHAHAHAAHAHAHA
NO WAY NO WAY.
I cannot imagine the sec 4s role playing as cadets.
but I CAN imagine myself trying hard to control my laughter if that happens.

I want a mentor!!!!
You know?
Sec 4s make us their apprentices.
That would be cool!
RIGHT RIGHT RIGHT?

anyway..
I need to somehow convince all the sec 3s to come for informal training.
I need to somehow convince all the sec 4s to come for informal training.
I need to somehow find a suitable date where both parties can attend the training.

I gotta get used to this post.
And I need to increase my proficiencies in NPCC.

haha. gotta get used to people saying: "OIC seyy!"
GAH.

Your new OIC is shyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.

Embarrassment.

2010-05-24T04:20:00.000-07:00

GAHHH.

I had weapon training today...
not bad arh...

I simply love the way I do the Immediate Action Drill (IA).
SUPER COOL LA!
AND FAST!
YEAHHHH!

haha..
Something happened in school today.

It was rather sudden and unexpected.
But that was what made it (Y)

________________________________________________
Can we delay POP until July...
I have no mood to do the proposal.
and I need to focus on my holiday homework (XD)
and SYF trainings!

Fatigued.

2010-05-22T00:31:00.000-07:00

GAH.

there was training yesterday.
and I wasn't online when I got home.

Why?

TIRED LA.

In the morning there was the NPCC day celebration
Woke up super early.
ate small breakfast at home.
and took some crackers to eat on the way to school
Breakfast on the go!

I was wearing my new set of uniform.
That was something I regret doing.
I think I took a size too big for my blouse.
and a size too big for the beret.
its like..
when I move my head to look at the ground...
it can fall off...
BUT WHAT TO DO???
MY OLD BERET IS ALREADY DISCOLOURED.

GAHHHH. I hope that they will shrink.
:D

ok...
Sodoku inter-unit competition.
yeah I wasnt there again :(
SYF TRAINING!!!
I think, that god-willing, I will get to participate in the parade.
:D

Yesterday's training was really...
tiring.
but maybe waking up early in the morning had something to do with the fatigue.

_____________________________________

I gotta keep telling myself...

Actually, I don't know what to think anymore.

So let's just wait for this feeling to go away.

Let's liven the mood by a little.

2010-05-19T05:46:00.000-07:00

Still sad about what happened in school today.

but never mind.

I'm here again to talk about the leadership training. The one where only selected people were chosen to go.

Guess what?
This course demoralized me.

Ok we did a personality quiz.
And I got type C/S.

I don't know how to say this..
But the instructor was being biased when explaining the personality types.

It was like:
Type D are BORN LEADERS.
Type I are INFLUENTIAL.
Type S are shy.
Type C are careful.

I mean. Why must all the cheem words go to type D and I?

And what is the deal with D being born leaders?

Maybe my judgement is biased too..
Maybe I'm just jealous that I got a C instead of a D.
Maybe I'm just disturbed by the fact that I'm going to handle a high-responsibility post
and I have a C type personality.
Whose greatest fear is critisim.
Maybe I'm just jealous that someone else has a D type personality.

Throughout the whole course, he was praising D type personalities.

I want to be determined.
I want to be dominant.
I want the qualities of a D-type personality.
and yet I was told to stick with your personality type.

In any case.
The personality quiz certainly did not define my personality.
My personality can never be deciphered.
Only I can do that.
Because I know myself the best.

Yeah, maybe my greatest fear IS critisism.
and sure, I have a C type personality.
but that doesn't mean that I don't possess the qualities of a D-type personality.

I may not be born a leader.
but doesn't mean I'm not a leader either.

The personality test was just a luxury, not a neccessity.
Thank you for the honour for me to attend the course.
but I can manage fine without it.

It's all a journey of self-discovery.

Realisation

2010-05-19T00:17:00.000-07:00

My mood has been changing frequently during these few days.

Maybe I'm just bothered by what people think of me.

I've really got to stop being irritating.

Stop annoying others.
Stop complicating others.
Stop making other people mad at you for no reason.

Stop being so moody.

My personality type: C/S
ME?
Competent?
Creative?
Calculative?

HAH! That's a joke!

Maybe I should just give up.
You know?
So I won't disappoint myself or anyone else.

But all that talk about motivation.
About being a good leader?
I don't want that to go to waste either.

Then just mask it.
Beneath that cool, confident exterior
is a personality that's shrinking...
It's dying..
But what can I do?

I just have to bear those feelings
Kept tightly under wraps.
Cuz if I let them out, I will explode.

Beneath that cold, unfriendly, aloof exterior
is the real me.
And no one will manage to get through to me.
Not ever.

It's like being guarded by multiple barriers.
And all those barriers are activated by fear.

Mask those fears
those feelings
those emotions that you've kept for so long.

I might crack but I will never break.

Leadership training.

2010-05-18T02:00:00.000-07:00

OMG.
I have ulcers.
In my mouth.

2 of them...
Irritating to the max.

ARGH!

Leadership training again today...
(Y)
It's COOL.
The last to Cs were AWESOME!

Character
Connection
Competence
Commitment

COOL SEH.
HAHAHAHA.

Selected people are going for tomorrow's course.
I have mixed feelings for it.

But yeah. I feel inspired! :D

And I must say... I'm extremely proud of myself for controlling my emotions today.
TEEHEE.
I see an improvement.
From being embarrassed and shy,
I've leveled up to being able to control my facial expressions and emotions at a particular scenario today.

HELL YEAH!

Clashes.

2010-05-17T02:31:00.000-07:00

I don't know what I'm feeling now...
Is it disappointment?

June holidays.
A lot of clashes.

I dunno what to say anymore...

Let's just hope for the best.
:)

Weekends deserve longer posts (:

2010-05-15T01:17:00.000-07:00

I tell you.

I'm a failure when it comes to socialising.

#)(@$!#($@
I feel PAISEH la.
It's super AWKWARD can?
So I don't talk to people unless there is a dire need to so.
when I say "people" I mean like strangers and those who I don't speak to often.

and especially with those who are younger than me.
I CANNOT DO IT.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

I shall train on socialising with my juniors but not so much
up till the point that they think I'm an easy-going senior.

Little kids are driving me up the wall.
and they make me feel guilty.
but ARGH I can't blame them...
cuz their kids.
small kids.

Embarrassment is not a nice feeling.
I mean when you'r friends disiao u and stuff like that..
that's not so bad.

I think since because everyone has high expectations of me...
When I do something wrong,
I feel guilty to the max.

Right, I shall do something beneficial now...
like plan my hols with wonderful events.
but I don't have the schedule for SYF trgs!!!
DO YOU KNOW HOW CONFINED I FEEL???
From now on, I shall bring my planner everywhere I go.

Upcoming events soon:
NPCC day
Sodoku Inter-unit challenge
0.22 revolver shoot prelims round

I will be missing the sodoku part.
but the TO put me as the AOIC for the event.
haha.
Now I dunno what to say.

I really need to stop feeling paranoid.
Cuz I think.... ARGH.
I just don't like to be feel left out.
and I hope if anyone is not happy with me..
we can settle it in a peaceful manner.

I'm younger than most my squadmates and friends.
SO PLEASE LEND ME YOUR GUIDANCE.

Friends: I have very few close friends. So yeah if I'm annoying you please tell me... :)

Squadmates: I know we have some fights because all of us have ambitions. but I want you to know that I will put your ideas into serious consideration before deciding on anything. :)

Seniors: er... on your own account if you want to give me advice on how I can improve my leadership style, I don't mind.

CIs: I need help from these ppl too! I've yet to exercise my leadership skills after so long. I hope that under your supervision, I will become a better person.

TOs: Yeah. They have high expectations of me. I will do my best not to disappoint.

Juniors: I believe that I have some things to learn from this grp of people too! Constructive critism is encouraged too!

heh. Okay I write a lot without knowing...
That's what you can expect when I'm bored...
GAH I need something to do.

Oh yeah. I need to plan my hols.
I bet holiday homework is gonna start pouring in this weekend.
Homework on top of courses on top of SYF trainings.
ARGH.

NDP / SYF

2010-05-14T05:26:00.000-07:00

OMG. AFTER SO LONG. NDP TRAINING.

): saddened that it's not with my unit.

Went to HTA for NDP training.
TO already sent my name as reserve because of some special reasons.

I tell you these reasons are really really... WOOOO! (Y) (Y) (Y)
Haha. :) Let's just say that these reasons made me kinda happy and relieved.

ok as I was saying, NDP trg at HTA today.
and then the HQ staff suddenly said that a part of us cannot go for NDP.
not even as reserve.
from 150ppl to 100ppl.

SIGH... Even though I already know that I am a reserve.
I was still hoping that I could participate NDP as a reserve.
DAMN DAMN DAMN.

but it's okay. I have good news too!

I changed from NDP reserve to SYF Guard of Honour Girls' Contigent!
GOH !!! GUARD OF HONOUR !!!!!
AND IT'S NO. 1 UNIFORM!!!
LIKE OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG.

But I think the standard of our drills is really...
=_____________________=
I dunno why but I feel inferior when marching at HTA.

but it's kinda boring to be in an all girls contigent.
There are no cheeky guys to create trouble and start a convo...

haha but its ok.
get to wear No. 1 uniform! (Y)

YEAH. another thing to add to my to-do list.
observe how the CIs teach us at HTA.
then can apply the skills at KSS.

HELL YEAH!

To-dos

2010-05-13T06:48:00.001-07:00

I don't want to do this anymore.

Seriously whatever.
I shall just carry on with my life.

I'm going to try some new stuff.

1) Be more sensitive/considerate about other people's feelings.
2) Find my own leadership style.
3) Boycott the idea of being UNREASONABLY mean

June hols are packed packed packed!
and my weekeend is reduced to only 1 day.

OH, THE AGONY.

I feel hungry... hmm.. I shall find something to eat.
:)

Mixed feelings.

2010-05-12T05:41:00.000-07:00

heh.

I'm having a whole lot of mixed feelings.
._.

Excited because of NDP.
Sad because I'm missing 2 training days away from the unit.
Doubtful because the Sec 3s are taking over soon.
Apprehensive to know who gets to be the OIC [and AOIC].
Sort of sad because the Sec 4s are passing out soon.
Scared because all the juniors are looking at you because you're the oldest.
Confused on what image to portray when the sec 3s take over.
Skeptical if I'm going to be a good leader/role model to others.
Excited for NPCC day.
Excited for events that might happen on POP.
Stressed to write out the proposal for POP.
Embarrassed because for some strange reason, my face feels warm when someone speaks of something.

EXTREMELY SAD because there are only a few trainings left before POP.
and I'm away for 2 trainings.

The truth is that without the seniors to look up to..
I feel insecure.
and we're the seniors that everyone looks up to now.
and if I screw up, everyone will be watching.
and that's just embarrassing.
OH GOD. I FEEL DAMN STRESSED.

Sure, I might have proved to my TO that I can be a good leader.
But I've yet to prove to myself that I can be a good leader.
And what do the CIs think of me?
What do the seniors think of me?
What do the juniors think of me?

I mean...
If you compare me with the previous OICs,
I think that there's a HUGE HUGE gap.
emphasis on the HUGE.

I need a pep talk.
I'm SOOO gonna force it out of them during POP.
:P

I shall start to build my aloof personality.
No singlish, no friendly smile, no meaningless small talk.
No socialising, no tone of worry, no more being skeptical.
No more feeling paiseh. No more feeling sorry.

Once I start being aloof, there is no looking back.

I shall transform into someone new.
That confident senior.
The one who maintains discipline.
and that standard which should never be lowered.

The chosen one.

2010-05-10T20:36:00.000-07:00

AHHHH. hahaha.

I feel so HONOURED.
HAHAHAHAHA.

I was chosen to go for NDP.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

hahaha.

Happy lurh!
:DDD

Can I have the fun pack please?
LOL.
NAH JUST KIDDING.
OK. I'm feeling kinda high.

Because exams are over.
and my TO has high regards for me
and chose me to go for NDP.

I have to be at my best.
Because out of the 3 people who are going,
1 of us is probably gonna be reserve.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
But all the best to everyone.
:DDDDD

What???

2010-05-10T01:48:00.000-07:00

I shall not talk much about exams.
Cuz there's so little things to talk about.
Last paper is tomorrow.
(Y)(Y)(Y)

I just HAVE to blog about this.
I need to get this out.
so that I won't have throbbing headaches.
AHHHH.

This morning, while walking to school,
My Teacher Officer caught up with me.
and she suddenly asked me...

"Are you keen on becoming OIC?"
I was speechless at that time.
My actions, and thinking processes were lagging at that time.
and I could have sworn that my face was red at that time.

I couldn't really remember what I replied to her.
So haha. I'll write what I think and feel about me becoming OIC.

Actually, I'm not very confident of being the OIC of the unit.
x_x
I've got weaknesses in some fields of NPCC.
My drills are ok...
My campcraft is ok...
My physical fitness is unacceptable.

OICs are supposed to be PERFECT role models, you know?
Emphasis on the "perfect"
And because I'm lacking at that area,
Its the equivalent of a cat with half a tail.

but I'm not totally rejecting that idea.
I mean..
Come on, it's Overall-in-Charge!
To get that post would be an honour!

So she said that she would discuss it with Ms Foo.
and so all I have to do now is trust their judgement and respect their decision.

HAHA! My head has stopped throbbing...
well almost...
:D

Exams have started!

2010-04-28T05:55:00.000-07:00

OMG. A lot of things happened in school today.

MYE started yesterday.
Today was the MTL paper.

OMG. Mdm Hayati rocks! hahaha.
She got food outside staffroom during the break b4 p2 starts.
HAHAHA.
She asked me if I wanted.
OFC LA.
hahaha
free food, yo!
Who doesn't what?

and yeah. A lot of things happened today.
I feel like burying my face.

anyway. I want to share a video! :D

thats all for today. ahaha :)

Why do I suddenly freeze up when I see you?

Of dreams and reality

2010-04-24T20:05:00.000-07:00

Did I dream about it?

Or was it real?

Why do I remember it so vividly?

It was about someone in my CCA telling me via FB/msn chat that I had a different personality..
or something like that..

Why do I feel so bothered about this?

2010-04-23T07:27:00.000-07:00

Right. Had a talk with a senior.
and saw some comments on Facebook.

I'm telling you. I kinda starting to lose interest in my CCA.
It's like nothing I ever do is beneficial.

but really. Why did I join NPCC in the first place?
I wanted to change myself?

And moping around won't really help.

So I'm not going to give up just yet.
I may not be entirely committed.
but I'm never gonna quit.

I'm feeling hopeful.
But I shouldn't get my hopes up too high.

Prioitise.
MYE first.
and then concentrate on MOI.

The fire that was so strongly lit before in me is dying...
but it is not extinguished

Resolve, rescilience, renewal.

2010-04-22T06:07:00.000-07:00

Why is today such a bad day?

I'm crying again.
Why?

I don't know
I just feel really really sad.
Because of the previous post.

and some people are just...
nvm.

I shan't elaborate.

but really,
explain this extreme sadness that I'm feeling.

My father scolded me for losing my FNN notebook.
but why?
I didn't steal my own notebook!

I just feel... like crap.

and the EMO phase of my life begins again.

2010-04-22T05:55:00.000-07:00

I really don't know what's going on.

But today.
I feel useless.

I feel like giving up on life.

I feel that everything I do will all go to waste.
I feel that everything I do will not be good enough.

All my efforts... wasted...
And I'm reduced to ashes.

2010-04-22T03:32:00.000-07:00

Freak! I lost my FNN notebook!!!

What f*** is this?
I have a feeling that someone took it.
Cuz I left the notebook in class.
The next day it was lost.
EFF EFF EFF EFF EFF.

WHAT SIA!
I'M DAMN PISSED OFF!

My essays! My notes! My coursework!
AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why did that bloody idiot take my notebook?
My handwriting also not that nice!!!

WAD THE EFF LA!!!
NOW I HAVE TO COPY BACK EVERYTHING INTO A NEW NOTEBOOK!

_l_ AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
I FEEL LIKE SCREAMING.

2010-04-21T01:38:00.001-07:00

WTF IS YOUR PROBELM?
We don't even know you and you're doing this to us.

It's so obvious that you were doing it on purpose.

So what if you're ONE year older than us?
Big f*** arh?

Stay out of personal affairs that do not involve you.

2010-04-17T06:17:00.000-07:00

OMG. NPAP DAMN SYOIK!

ahhhhhhhhh.
I dunno what to elaborate on.
BUT IT WAS REALLY REALLY NICE!

ESPECIALLY THE MARCH IN!!!

OMG!
And that time.
It was windy.
So the flags were really flying.
wheee.

Kranji NPAP '10 people. You guys are DAMN CUTE. When I saw the Kranji Flag after the parade was over, I was waving to you guys like mad. Then when you guys saw us among the spectators, you started to SCREAM and RUN towards us with OPEN ARMS.

HAHAHA! THAT WAS DAMN FUNNY!!!

HAH! I shall upload pictures and videos another time.
that is... IF they are of good quality.

2010-04-16T05:32:00.000-07:00

Something happened during NPCC today.

Promotion test continued from last week.

ok. I feel guilty for not doing well last week.

I really do.

Maybe you can't see it in me.

That's probably because I don't want to demoralize the rest.

Just because I don't do well for my promotion test

doesn't mean that I have to pull down the rest with me.

It loooks like I still have not awaken from la la land, today.

I was laughing and smiling and not being serious.

Sorry no cure.

So I shall just move on to talk about another topic.

During de-brief, Mam posed a question to us.

Why our standard de-proved

Why are we performing at such a low standard

I didn't think about this until I reached home.

In my case, I was too over-confident.

I've already explained this in one of my previous posts.

It's because I'm already considered a senior.

so arrogance took over.

Moving on to the next topic I want to blog about...

I really can't help but think that the TOs, CIs, seniors and squadmates find me annoying.

I really don't know if they don't like me.

Especially my TO.

but never mind.

I shall ask nicely now.

If there's anything that you're not happy about me.

Just tell me.

U can tell me anyway.

1) Through fb or msn.

2) Write a letter.

3) Straight to my face.

It would be very much appreciated if you use the 3rd method.

so yeah. I want to improve myself.

therefore, I try to take some steps to do that.

Maybe I'm just being paranoid to think that ppl don't like me.

Maybe I'm not.

Maybe I was right.

I talk to much. So right now, I'll give others a chance to talk and just keep my mouth shut.

2010-04-15T02:21:00.000-07:00

It started to rain during piano lesson.

And now there's a THUNDERSTORM!

OMG. GAVE ME A JOLT!
My heart was about to pop out!
and the lightning was very distinct!

OMG. I DON'T WANT TO BE ALONE.
and I'm too scared to play music on the computer...
AHHH.
DAMN SCARY.

Today was a fine day.
When I say fine, I mean.. average.
It was full of ups and downs.

I feel ngelected.
And I feel noticed. (:

Sort of.
Kind of.

At the end of the day.
I feel super super tired.
Had to lug my bag home.

I want to stop these feelings.
but I don't want to.
Do you know how that feels?

OMG THUNDERSTORM!

2010-04-14T05:05:00.000-07:00

I regret taking geog.
The teachers are like...
wtf?

This is not a complaint.
I'm just expressing my feelings.
Get it straight that I am NOT COMPLAINING.
I already made up my mind not to complain about anything.

:O
CAMPCRAFT THIS FRIDAY!!!
but the sec 3s have promo test!
OMG!
WHY WHY WHY?
I WANT TO JOIN CAMPCRAFT~
IT'S DAMN DAMN DAMN FUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ARGH!!!

but nvm. I shall concentrate on my Promotion test first.
Method of instruction!
MOI MOI MOI!
GAMBATTE!!!!!!!!

oh shoot. I'm supposed to do my homework...

2010-04-12T02:27:00.000-07:00

AKU NGANTUK.

Translation: I'm sleepy.

Today is Monday.
And I seem to be blogging a lot more lately...

AHHHHHHHH. NGANTUK.
:D

2moro got Physics test! :o

2010-04-11T04:18:00.000-07:00

I'm happy to say that I've ALMOST snapped out of the trance I was in, two previous posts ago.

ok..
I'm sort of happy when I thought of this idea.
Here's how the story goes.

I wanted to go for a First Aid course during the June Holidays.
So I decided to surf the web for some courses.
I went to the Singapore Red Cross Society website.

I WANT TO ATTEND THE STANDARD FIRST AID COURSE.
LIKE SERIOUSLY!

I've got a passion for first aid, you know?
ok. So I want to go for that course.
I already told my parents.
They looked willing to let me go.
but the problem is...

I DON'T WANT TO GO ALONE.
That will be weird.
being the only teenager there.
and the rest are adults! o.o

So I thought of this idea!
Why not the Sec 3 squad go together?
hahaha.
so here's another problem.
some of them seem uninterested in this idea.
X_X

ahhh.
If we go as a big group,
we might get a discount for the course fee?
and it would me much less awkward for me to go there.
cuz I got friends!
and if we pass the test,
all of us can get the first aid badge!!!
HOW COOL WOULD THAT SOUND???

It's killing 2 birds with 1 stone!!!
MY PASSION FOR FIRST AID AND NPCC!!!
but... that is..
if my TO accepts the idea...

If not I'll just have to go alone.
TT.TT
but I'll just put up the course details here if anyone is interested to go with me.

Course: Standard First Aid Course
Date: Preferably 31May-2June 2010
Time: 9am-6pm (8 hours)
Fee: $107 per trainee (+$35 for optional First Aid Manual)

At the end of the course, trainee will be a certified first-aider, equipped with skills to render first aid in times of urgency. Topics covered include tending to wounds, fractures, burns, individuals who suffered heart attacks and others.

I know the fee is like WOW!
but if you're interested.
Please do let me know.

You can visit this website for more information:
http://www.redcross.org.sg/learn-first-aid.phtml

I need to ask my Teacher Officer first! AH!

2010-04-09T19:37:00.000-07:00

My previous blog post was...
.......................................................
really emo. Right?
It's been such a long time since I was this sad.
Maybe I'm just being overly sensitive.
so forget about me.

I'm trying to look on the positive side.
but it doesn't change the fact that I was disappointed with my own performance yesterday.

CAN I HAVE A RE-TEST, PLEASE?

rants.

2010-04-09T05:07:00.000-07:00

AISHAH WAS AN EPIC FAILURE DURING THE SERGEANT PROMOTION TEST TODAY.

Freak! I feel so useless!
I did all sorts of horrible horrible things this week.
Allow me to elaborate.

First. I've been really really really... egoistical.
U know?
Like act pro. In a bad way.
It's probably because I'm getting all this power get to my head.
because I'm already Sec 3. Already considered a senior.
I was over-confident during the promotion test.
And I have a strong feeling that I failed it.
I've been very very egoistical. There's no doubt about that.
Someone please knock some sense in my head.

Second. I've been a real bitch lately.
I'm sorry for the language but due to the lack of suitable words,
that will have to do.
Someone in class...
actually a lot of people in class.
Are not talking to me. and try not to reply me.
I'm not a very sociable person.
and I'm irritating.
So I'm sorry.
really really sorry.

Third. Complaining too much.
Really. I'm really disappointed with myself.
because of this.
really really frustrating.
complaining too much about NPCC.
I feel like such a spoilt brat.
And I have to stop complaining right NOW.
I shall hang on. No matter how hard it is.

Fourth. Disrespecting the seniors.
I found out the person at fault was me. Not the seniors.
I've been asking too much from them.
I sort of outwardly contradict what that they want.
and I roll my eyes a lot when they say something I don't like.
I realise now that the relationship between a senior and junior
must be just that. and nothing more.
Even being friends, will be risky.
So I'll just leave it at that.

And if anyone from NPCC somehow manages to see this post (especially the seniors),
then I'd just like to say...
I'm sorry.
Sincerely sorry.

I just wanted to be equal.
but I realise now that it's impossible.

another thing is that. Mdm is showing signs of not favouring me.
Is it because I do too much and don't give others the opportunity?
Well, I'm sorry for that.
We ARE under probation after all.
From now on, I'll just try to lay low and unnoticed.

Compared to the seniors I'm nothing.
Nothing.
My leadership skills are nothing to brag about either.
Sometimes I ask myself, what the heck I've been doing for the 2 years I've been in NPCC.

Fuck! Why am I crying?

So I'll stop throwing complaints.
I'll stop this bitchy attitude.
I'll stop bragging.
I stop everything.
Even my true feelings for you.

I have very little confidence of passing the Sergeant Promotion Test.

My morale is at an all-time low.

I have absolutely NO confidence in taking over the Unit or squad for that matter.

I'm not ready to be a suitable NCO.

2010-04-07T01:39:00.000-07:00

Today!
F&N! (Y)

Baked macaroni and CHEESE!!!
The roux sauce was very nice!!! :DDD
and got chese more!!!
If add capsicums and pepper will be nicer!
and more meat!
and and the prego sauce!

OMG! WILL BE DAMN NICE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Today! Slacked in class and canteen. DM chased out ppl from the class..
ok not excactly chase... but u get the idea.
sort of did homework at the canteen with Atikah, Philene and Yentl.
and then went home.
:DD

I shall end this post on a serious note.
I know it was really last minute to have informal training on Thursday.
But seriously, if u purposely want to ponteng,
I really don't know what to say anymore.
no offense, but that is really sickening of you.

and you, bitch!
You'd better treat me with more respect.
Get rid of that bitchy attitude. For the sake of the squad.

I want to be the nice person to help people with their drills.
but seriously NPCC means nothing to you,
you can FAIL the Sergeant Promotion Test for all I care.
I'm not trying to say that I'm the best and all that.
but really, what kind of attitude is this?

I'm trying my best.
Why can't you?

2010-04-05T02:13:00.000-07:00

OMG!!!!!!!!!

What is PROMOTION DAY?
Is PROMO DAY=PROMO TEST?
WTF?
ON SUCH SHORT NOTICE???

Command list also haven't give!
And the last 2 previous weeks should be used to revise right?
OMG!
SICKENING LA!
Right after unit camp!
Where got time to practice with seniors and CIs guidance???

DIE LA DIE LA.
CANNOT MAKE IT LA.

2010-04-03T01:31:00.000-07:00

I'm damn bored right now...

At my grandma's house.
and I got nothing to do.
except do homework.
but seriously...
homework?
during weekends?

I feel like changing my blogskin.
but need to find a nice blogskin.
sigh.

DAMN BORED!!!

and I'm deprived of NPCC.
training was cancelled because it was Good Friday.
Sometimes I wish that NPCC fell on both Wednesday and Friday.
Wouldn't that be uber awesome?

You are always gonna be my love
even if u fall in love with someone else. - First love by Utada Hikaru

Call me selfish.
but for the past few weeks,
I found it impossible to suppress my feelings.

2010-04-01T03:48:00.000-07:00

erm... Unit camp finished...
it was a long time ago.
so I shall not bother to go into so much details.

Highlights of Camp!

BBQ!
It rocks!
but then.. my junior give me eat half-cooked chicken satay..
She wanted to give me. Then she dunno if cooked or not.
then she ask a sec 4 if its cooked or not..
the the sec 4 say it's cooked..
I ATE IT!
the next day I stomach ache!!!
AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!
LE MIN! WHY ME OUT OF ALL SENIORS?????
KELVIN! WHY ME OUT OF ALL JUNIORS?????

hmm... ok..
I super HEART my group and clan ok?
They rock.
My group is APOLLO!
I realised that it's a very cool name...
and I realised this after the camp ._.
Clan name is Zeus!
WOOHOO!
erm.. not much to say here..
but my clanmates super rock also!

I think I was too harsh on them during the performance rehearsal.
and I need to control my anger.
I still don't have a high enough status to make them fear me.
I want to maintain discipline.
but I don't want to be enemies with them either.

so right now.. I have a puzzle to solve.
How do you maintain discipline in the unit without being enemies with them?

Another event was the Amazing Race that the sec 3s planned.
I would say it was... ok...
Everything was so last minute...
This is what happens when everyone decides to pon the meeting. =.=
not only that.
we planned this game for the sec 4s to join in with us..
but they used this time to prepare for their own water activities.
sometimes I think that they treat us like their competition instead of their juniors.

then water activities...
I seriously didn't feel like playing.
I was in too bad a mood to enjoy myself.
So I gave an excuse that I wasn't feeling well.
and yeah..
after playing capture the flag,
the clans had to do a cheer...
I didn't play with them..
so I also didn't get to cheer with them...
then I hear their cheer so soft..
ahhhhh.
I wished I was there with them...
My clan is nothing without me!
MUAHAHAHAHA.
ok sorry..

but Apollo was a good group!
really good.
:D

so yeah. unit camp. quite slack lurhs

You don't know my thoughts at all.
Everytime you walk past,
I just seem to subconsciously smile.

It's embarrassing so don't laugh.
I'm just saying stupid things again.

Unit Camp!

2010-03-25T03:23:00.000-07:00

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Unit camp soon!
GONNA BE...
I dun wan to say..
scared ltr the opposite reaction churned up.

but I'm SUPER EXCITED.
i dunno what to say.
I VERY EXCITED.

but my SENIOR really very BLURRR SOTONG.
VERY HARD to explain things to him.

but nvm.
Cuz I'm still looking forward to the camp.
even though its only 2d1n.
and we have to fall in straight after Sports Fiesta.
=.=

NVM!
I still look forward to it! :D

2010-03-20T22:05:00.000-07:00

I'm feeling lethargic and fatigued today.

Got no mood to do hw.

Yesterday night.
at around 1.30am
I wasn't feeling well.
Woke up. Realised I was having stomach ache.
IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT.
then went to toilet..
then had a cup of water.
I tried to go back to sleep...

but then I vomitted.
a lot.
like 1 whole plastic bag.
argh

and now Im feeling fatigued.

NVM I shall do my best to complete hw. =___=
like real.

hahs. I found interesting things on FB.
and I don't know how to respond.
So I'll prolly pretend nothing happened.
so yeah.

bye.

Pissed off again.

2010-03-19T00:55:00.000-07:00

Why can't we for once be more like them?
I mean like.. be more functional and like a well-oiled machine???

Most of the people who came down today are passionate about NPCC.
I have to say that they have a sense of responsibility.
I don't blame all those who didn't turn up either.
I know that some of them were overseas at Cambodia or Vietnam.
and some of you have something on.
So ok..

But those who PURPOSELY missed this meeting, I really don't know what to say anymore...
I really don't think that I should be angry with the bunch of you because honestly, I'm just wasting my time and breath.
So fine. This is your attitude towards NPCC?
I shall not spend any ounce of effort on you anymore.

I'm really confused right now..
Do you think I've changed?
Am I bossy?
I just don't know what to think of myself anymore..

and another thing...
I really don't want to shift the blame on anyone..
but seriously why?
Why are all the instructions given so confusing and muddled up???
In the end, the sec 3s will get the scolding.

because of what happened today.
I really don't know what I was thinking.
Therefore I will suppress my feelings from now on.

so why?
The task was given to us.
Just because we have a bit of a reaction lag, u give the job to the seniors..
and u never tell us...
You don't trust the sec 3s.
How the hell are we supposed to take over the unit if u don't place your trust in us?
So our inputs are not valued.
ok. Whatever.
and seniors.

What is with the sudden change in attitude?
Just because u're sec 4...
u treat us like this.
I really really wish I'm not posting this on my blog now.
but it cant be helped la.
seriously...
can u choose your words carefully and keep us within the circle?
We're taking over soon.
and u're not preparing us for anything
are u trying to make us take everything for granted?
So seriously..
I'm gonna put this in caps just in case people cannot see.

LEAVE THAT ATTITUDE SOMEWHERE ELSE BEFORE YOU TALK TO ME
OR ANY OF THE SEC 3S FOR THAT MATTER.

If anyone from NPCC sees this...
feel free to confront me about it.
If u want to single me out, fine.
Rather 1 person than the whole squad.
I'm not trying to act pro.
But just because of this post u blame the whole squad.
NO.
Embarrass me, single me out, use vulgarities.
Whatever.
Just don't scold the whole squad.

2010-03-15T02:16:00.001-07:00

I know I shouldn't be feeling this way.
but I'm human!
For goodness sake!
How many times must I repeat myself?

I'm HUMAN!!!
Have u ever considered what a difficult situation u put me in?

2010-03-10T04:42:00.000-08:00

I seriously have no proper adjective to describe today.
It was slack. SUPER DUPER SLACK.
I shall not use exclamation marks in this post. Cuz that would make it look not serious.
I'm damn pissed off. SUPER DUPER PISSED OFF.

I won't mention this group of people I'm addressing.
I hope it'll be SUBTLE enough.

And I hope that you don't think I think I'm the best among all of you.
I just posted this, becuz there was a need to.
Why do you think I was put on Earth. If you think the answer was to serve you, then you're wrong.
Cuz its 100% false.
When you were sec 1 you chose what u wanted.
You have it now.
So why are you giving INVALID AND STUPID EXCUSES to explain why you're not committed?
WAKE UP YOUR IDEA.
You had a choice.
You chose it.
You got it.
What more do you want?

Right now, you think that I'm doing my best.
For the sake of everyone, I am doing my best.
but what did u do?
You climbed on my head.
Took advantage of me.
What am I to you?
Just because I do my very very best, don't think that you don't have to do anything.
BULLSHIT.
Fine I admit. I did my best.
I looked DESPERATE.
At least I had a sense of responsibility.

So if you have the guts to step up, be my guest.
Cuz honestly, if you're not gonna appreciate what I've done,
I shouldn't bother doing anything right?
STOP TAKING ME FOR GRANTED.
I'm only human. I have limited patience.

So if you continue to ignore me, I'll just ignore you.
an eye for an eye.

You want to push all the responsibilities to me right?
FORGET IT.
Cuz I'm not going to do it if all of you are nonchalant.

I won't step up if no one wants me to.
Yes. I've changed.
You've made me this way.

2010-02-27T21:42:00.000-08:00

AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Campcraft competition prelimenary was yesterday...
and I chionged...
seriously...
hahaha...
I can see the boys far away...
I dun like that lot! :P
the lot = the space for campcrafting...
cuz the boys are far away from us... then can barely hear their cheers...
xD

After cc...
played captain ball!
ahaha! Fun fun fun!
My junior kept screaming to irritate the seniors so they wont block her...
XD

after that... go mac!
:D
ok den byebye go home!

Today... I am at home...(duh!)
and my body is aching...
especially at my right shoulder blade...
maybe cuz of my pro pegging yesterday!
hahaha..

I'm kind of sad...
that nothing changed abt the sec 3 squad...
how do I explain myself?
Its not that I hate them or anything...
I was just hoping to see some improvement in terms of attitude...

and the sec 3 campcrafters were asked to talk to the rest of the sec 3s...
i just don't know what to say at this point in time...

but what's important is that I still have faith in the Sec 3s
and we can change for the better! :D

2010-02-05T05:09:00.001-08:00

I just realised that my previous post was long long made...

this week is okay I guess...
only that this is probably the most tiring week so far...

busy with homework
with NPCC
and yea.. other stuff...

OMG! I need to do t-shirt design for npcc!
damn damn damn!

2moro pass up...
0.0
and I have no idea what to do...
let's go find pics on the internet!

Hopefully that will give me some inspiration...

and I just wanna make a special shoutout for those who have been tagging me!
:D
yay!

2010-01-22T04:58:00.000-08:00

TODAY WAS PROMOTION DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And you know what I feel like???

It doesn't feel like hooray!
I'm a Coporal!

its more of a...
KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm A LANCE COPORAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

but after the ceremony...
we got...
Lectures!!!!!!!

no excitement...
but the nice thing is after the whole assignment is done...
we can get our badges!!!

hohoho!
and another thing I want to say is that...
I asked for permission to take out our bags again...
and I DON'T LIKE IT!!!
UGH!
It's like super embarrassing when everyone is staring at you...
and all the seniors inside were like...
*stare*
IT MAKES MY SKIN CRAWL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

hahaha

ok enough of that..

Hmm... I think..
that today's training was unfair..
cuz the Sec 4s had the CIs all for themselves!!
xDDD
ok lurh..
I dunno why..
but I suddenly want to be more friendly with the CIs...

2moro got campcraft trg..
Hope Amirah is gonna be there...

Today, I forgot to bring my tie..
and I had to stand at the back...
den the Head Prefect recorded my name..
And I just noticed how she was...

She treated me like some kind of lowlife...
She thinks lowly of me...
and I just thought if I would be like that when I became a CL.
Eventhough I haven't experienced leading such a big group before...
I think it's a harder job than I had ever imagined...

To balance everything out...
To maintain discipline
and at the same time, be humble.
To give out orders effectively,
and yet, not sound demanding.
To give praises
but not until the point where they become over-confident

It's easy to be a stereotype..
but to be an effective leader...

That's a whole other different thing...

2010-01-15T05:07:00.001-08:00

This time.. The pattern is gonna change..

Instead of me posting about something happy...
I shall vent out my anger again...
and guess what?
It's on the same topic as the previous posts...

Sure, some of us have feedbacked to Ms Chen..
I KNEW THAT THIS WAS BOUND TO HAPPEN!
Ms Chen said that she wasn't petty...

LIES...

Everything that happened today...
Everything was fake...

I knew something was wrong...
and I just didn't believe that this miracle would happen..
I believed my instincts...
right until she praised us...
I was so caught on actually thinking that our relationship with her was progressing...
but I didn't know that she was forced to say those words..

Her facial expressions gave her away...

so we're in a difficult position...

I don't know if we should have a talk with her..

or just leave the problem...

and look at how many people she brainwashed...
now we have no one to look up to...

Therefore,
I learned that we cannot regain trust easily..
and that there are some things in life that have to be ignored..
no matter how hard it is..

Now, with no one to look up to,
We'll set the pace...

Today is the last day I wake up as a cadet.
For I am now a Cadet Leader.

2010-01-08T04:39:00.000-08:00

hmm... okay..
I know that most of the time I come here...
I post about something not nice...
and then try to make it happier the next time...

so let's start with something unpleasant..

NPCC!
I think that some people are being biased..
and they abuse their power to get even with us...
I don't want to name who..
But I think it's pretty clear who I'm talking about..

I also think that some people have changed...
Why is everything so easy when we were younger?
Why did they change?
Now I have witnessed how power changes people
and their treating us like... strangers..
I mean..
Isn't the duty of a senior to make their juniors feel welcome
make them feel like their wanted or something like that???

and obviously if you think negatively about us
we lose hope
the outcome is obviously negative too!

and they talk as if their so perfect...
fuck la!
I've seen and heard you drag your feet...
you're tired?
were you the one who stands in sedia all day?
you think that we have no sense of urgency
the fuck is wrong with you?
Still can WALK in front of so many Sec 1s
When you see us run, then you run?
STOP ACTING SUPERIOR

"It's too late to help you now."

Then is it too late to become Cadet Leaders?

"I'm not gonna bother myself with you guys now."

Then why are you still here?
Why are you still scolding us?

Only say things that you mean...
Cuz seriously... It's just making us hate you more
and you're just rubbing salt into wounds

When was the last time you smiled at us?
When was the last time you praised us when we did something good?

Take pride in your pain for you are stronger than those who have none. - Lois Lowry

The CIs don't think that we can we Cadet Leaders.
But they're wrong.
I believe in the 14th Batch of Cadet Leaders.
and the unit will not fall if we all have faith in ourselves.

2010-01-04T00:14:00.000-08:00

First day of School!!!

was okayyyyyyyyyy...
I have mixed feelings now...

and I don't really know what I should be doing now...

and guess what?
There's NPCC training 2moro...
and 2moro is the 2nd day of school...
Isn't that...
-___________-

but I guess its okay...
NPCC marhs!
syoik rite?
:D

2009-11-30T21:19:00.000-08:00

hmm...
I haven't posted for a while...
and my previous post was...
er...
yea............

SO I SHALL MAKE IT HAPPIER!!!

WATCH SHUGO CHARA!!!
hahaha..
It's a Shuojo anime..
WHICH IS WHY ITS NICE

er...
Buono! also damn nice lorh! xD
I think I prefer JPop than KPop
no offense to those who like KPop!
We all have our likes and dislikes rite?
Not that I don't like KPop..
but...

you get the idea rite?

YAY! I like Imuto!
He resembles a cat?
yea!
hahaha!
and he plays violin too!!!
hahaha.. I have a soft spot for guys who play string instruments..
;D

and...
Something is on 2moro...
I'm SCARED...
REALLY SCARED...

I think I shall post abt 2moro...
If I feel like it...

2009-11-24T03:24:00.000-08:00

I feel so wasted...
why?

I feel like I don't belong...
why?

I feel like a jerk...
why?

The haze beyond your eyes clouds my sight
Are there feelings lying at the bottom of your heart?

Do you know of such a warmth
One that can embrace you on those lonely days by yourself?

What happened in days long past?
In your eyes, as turn your gaze away from me

Why, do I never see you smile around me?
Why, do I look up at the lonesome sky?

Why, am I feeling this way?

2009-11-15T15:59:00.000-08:00

Just came back from ATC at Pulau Ubin...

My whole body is aching sial...
I think most of us who attended this camp feel this way...

The camp was FUN!
except for some parts when I was not allowed to take part..
cuz I had slight fever..

Ms Foo even asked me if I wanted to go home..
and hell no! I didn't want to go home...

ok la so camp overall fun..
I lazy to type out what happened...
ehee...

______________________________________________
It seems that I have to dirty my blog a little bit..

cuz obviously someone has something against me...

If you don't like me..
fine..
That's not my problem..

So if you don't like me, stop using the cbox to insult me..
and in the first place..
If you don't like me, you shouldn't be at my blog

And if you wanted to insult me..
I'd feel better if u come up to my face and insult me...
cuz seriously.. You're just an idiotic coward to mask your identity away from me

So if you still want to play this childish game of holding something against someone..
be my guest..
because from now on, you shall not be entertained.

So get the fuck out of my life.

2009-11-09T02:04:00.001-08:00

HEY! YO!

hmm.. ok let's compare...I apologise for the inappropriate attire... hehe..

this is the look I created...

and...

This is the look the salonist created...
and...the look without any styling

(watcha lookin at? lol)

:PPPPP

sigh... i did an ok job rite?

weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

ok... another pic... without styling.. this one looks glossier..

for some unknown reason..

oooooooooo...hahaha

spooky..........

ok maybe not so spooky...

2009-11-08T05:09:00.001-08:00

I WENT TO PHILLIPS CARNIVAL AT TOA PAYOH TODAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And everything was super duper cheap!
I think my whole family was happy...
cuz we feel so happy to spend money on tht day!
SO CHEAP LA!!!! $_$
ekekeke...

We bought a rice cooker!
We bought a blender!
AND AND AND!
MOST IMPORTANTLY!!!
We bought a hair straightener!

can u believe it???
AND THEY SAY I NO NEED TO PAY FOR IT ALSO!
and they give it to me as a gift!!!
OMG!!!!!!! I'm so happy now!!!

normal price was $119
and we bought it at $75
SO CHEAP RITE???
I mean... got big sale rite???
ahaaha...

and got marble! To cool the hair... after u straighten it..
so my hair wont... be burnt...
O_O
EVERYBODY GO TOUCH WOOD!

hmm.. ok
den after I showered..
I went to try..(after my hair is dry of course)
weeeeeeee!!!!!!!
so fun!
And I'm waiting for the ceramic plates to cool down
before I keep it in my cabinet

hmm.. who wanna see the straightened hair?
haha.. I'll post pictures nxt time! :P

so this shall be the end of my post...
and just in case u were wondering...
Yes, I'm vain...
but this is who I am!
weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

2009-11-04T23:35:00.000-08:00

Wow! I was so bored that I had to resort to watching Barbie Diaries
to keep myself from dying of boredom...
there were quite a lot of bimbotic scenes in the movie..
and the graphics weren't really that good...

what should I do now??? Im helluva bored...

let's see if anyone is on rs... maybe make some new frens?
NAH! I don feel like I can make frens 2dae...

ok bye now!

2009-11-04T16:41:00.001-08:00

Yesterday went to Johor Baru!
or was is Johor Baharu?
ehehe... the ppl there hor..
are kinda snobbish...
sheesh..
I shall not pollute this blog with things tht are not worth my time...

Went to Angsana to cut hair...

The senior hairstylist quit her job already...

So this junior hairstylist named Ah Ling wash and cut my hair!

she did an ok job... But Jasmine(senior hairstylist) kinda made me more comfortable

cuz she was friendly!

Now I have side-swept bangs and layered hair..

Its a fail

in comparison with Selena Gomez...

hahaha...I think it looks nicer when the sides are straight..

at first she straightened the bangs

and I was... OMG!

WHY SO STIFF ONE???

and therefore it was annoying that the bangs couldn't curl to the side..

and kept coming down on my eyes...

but now can curl already! hahaha...

neh!

Sadly... its not tht sleek now...

Hmm... ok other than tht...

There's like a sudden gush of cats in my life...

ahaha random!

I'm alone in the house now...

I should go fix my breakfast now... byebye!

2009-11-03T00:52:00.000-08:00

Just returned from Civil Defence Headquarters...
the course was... okayyyy....
but the first aid course was gory and a bit perverted at some parts...
laceration is damn scary...
Lacerations are wounds caused by blunt objects... omg...
BLUNT OBJECTS??? eww..disgusting...
I can never be a surgeon.. When I see a lot of blood... I cannot tahan...
o.o

ok.. den the last 3 modules were very...er....
Cuz the trainer dunno how to teach... One of them dunno how to control the class
the other one speak very softly...

the course was basically common sense... =D
and I got free booklet! HOORAY!!! =.=
and after the course..
After the course went to toilet for a while...
Tried to scare Nicole cuz the coridor very dark.. hohoho.
but failed attempt.. she heard us talking outside the toilet...
and she came prepared...
sort of...
so after that went to look for the little kitten at the bus stop...
DUN HAVE EH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WALAU!!!
SOMEBODY TAKE ARH???????????????????

THE KITTEN DAMN CUTE CAN??????????????
WTF?? SOMEONE TOOK IT AWAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
pissed arh...grrrrrrrrrrr...

hmm.. let's talk abt something else...

SELENA GOMEZ!!! WOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
She rocks! WOOOOOOO!!!!

=DDDDD

Going to Malaysia 2moro..
gonna cut my hair!
like in the video!
WOOOOOOOO!!!
But must explain to the stylist...
I SHALL COME PREPARED!!!

ok.. thats all for now...
I figured out.

2009-11-02T05:59:00.000-08:00

Today...
decided to brisk walk with Sandra
(walking around 1 big round like a gundu head)
thts better than rotting at home right?

and then it started to rain before we met up...
i didn't get as wet as Sandra...
MUAHAHAHAHA!!!

changed plans to go to BPP instead..
and she bought KFC for her sis... [so thoughtful...(scarcastic)]
haha no lar...
and she was tempted to eat it...

one interesting convo we had...

we were crossing the road to bpp tht time

*Taxi moved in front into the pedestrian crossing*

Aishah: Aiyo. Why this taxi driver so impatient arh?

Sandra: huh?

Aishah: U see this sexy driver... so impatient...

Sandra: yea lorh...(so blur rite? ahaha)

Aishah: eh! I said sexy driver cuz I mixed up taxi and sexy!

Sandra & Aishah: *LAUGHING ALL THE WAY TO THE OTHER SIDE OF THE ROAD*

I bet thr were lots of ppl staring at us...

and I saw a kitten that time when i went to CD HQ...
gonna try to find it again! :)

hmm... ok.. I wanna go get ready some stuff for 2moro!
bye! :)

~2 November 2009
I'm sorry for changing. I'm sorry it had to be this way.

New blogskin, yeah!

2009-11-01T19:38:00.000-08:00

I'm tired of my blogskin
I'm bored at home
AND...
TA DA!!!
NEW BLOGSKIN!!!

hmm.. ok what shall I talk abt?
My new blogskin arh duhh!!
hmm.. ok..
I don't usually use pink do I?
but yeah.. it just looks nice to me!
and changed playlist too!

Selena Gomez rocks!!!
I just bought her DEBUT ALBUM yesterday!!!
woohoo!
and I bought earphones?(headphones?)(earpiece?)
wtv.

AND THE SONGS ARE NICE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Support her by buying her album!!!
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
._.

yeah she rocks man!!!

hmm... ok..
Relink and tag ok? :DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

I feel happy for no reason today...

2009-11-01T00:44:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was the last class project that 2F'09 got to do...
I was one of the Field cooking in charge..
let's call it FCIC
and the first thing tht the FCICs had to do was to scrub the mass tins...

SCRUB-A-DUB-DUB!!!
but it was damn sian and tiring...
sheesh!
AND THEY GAVE US THE WHOLE LOT OF MASS TINS TO WASH!!!
luckily NPCC mass tins no need to wash..
cuz its already clean! =D
only NCC mass tins need to wash...
haiyo...
and Yentl took pictures of us washing the mass tins...
o.o

AND AND AND! best joke of the camp:
we couldn't find the stoves for field cooking so we went to find Ms Foo
and Ms Foo told us tht the stoves were in the plastic bags..
den we say tht the things in the plastic bags were solid fuel only
den Ms Foo say tht the stove was in the plastic bags!!!
den she ask us to look for Ms Koh for more stoves
and then.. Janson and some others followed Ms Koh

the others were sitting down with the plastic bags at the canteen thr...
den Izzati was staring at the items inside the plastic bag...
den she say: "This is stove la!!!"
den everybody look at her...
den she took out the stove from its packaging...
and everybody was laughing like mad!!!!
AAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!!!!

cuz the packaging look very similar to each other...
tht nobody looked at the text that said "STOVE"

haha so anyway.. during lunch...
the FCIC had solid fuels and lighters in their hands...
or maybe flamethrowers! hahaha
so we had to walk down the stretch of drains?
and explain how to cook the rice...
and light the solid fuel for them...
Sigh... so tiring...
Hui Jie and Edmund were throwing water from the rice and said they wanted to cook it...
den Izzati or was it Atikah?
they said:

Atikah / Izzati: OI! WHY YOU THROWING YOUR WATER???
Edmund: huh? *looks at Hui Jie and then at Atikah/Izzati
Hui Jie: huh? since when cook rice need water?

I was like... whattheheck?

ok then.. someone clogged up the sink..
actually 2 ppl clogged up the 2 sinks..
and then IZZATI TO THE RESCUE!!!
den after everyone was already done eating... they clean up first..
and then FCICs take over... I think...
or maybe we ate first...

ok then... slack uhh... play monkey also!
den er... yeah! there were some ppl who went to Limbang to buy some stuff...
and I just remembered tht Ihaa owes me $2!!!
I shall remind her later...
and then last few hours were filled with thank yous and goodbyes...

I will miss 2F'09!
You have made me what I am today...

2009-10-29T00:18:00.000-07:00

I got a feeling
that tonight's gonna be a good night.
that tonight's gonna be a good night.
that tonight's gonna be a good good night.

Today is the last day of school!
SO SADDDDD!!!!!
DDDDDx

just now.. Janson asked me to pick one of his sheets of paper or something..
den I chose one..
and guess what it said?

FRIENDS

I think its not a coincidence man..
I mean.. I've been kind of quiet right?
But don't get me wrong..
Its not that I don't like you ppl.
I'm just a bit shy?
and sometimes I don't know what to say.

but seriously...
a shoutout to my friends over the past 2 years in KSS
I LOVE ALL OF YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!
And since we're probably gonna get seperated..
MUST KEEP IN TOUCH!!!

I love u ppl la..
seriously i dunno what to say already..
cuz I love u ppl...
seriously...

And and u know,
not only in KSS
But wherever i go..
Tuition or last time BPPS
or anything!!!
MAN, I LOVE YOU GUYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

All the best in suceeding in life, aites?

I LOVE LOVE LOVE YOU PEOPLE!
You made me feel high when I'm low!
So thanks for all the wonderful memories!

Tell me you love me too ok? hahaha <3

Hopeless romantic...

2009-10-22T02:09:00.000-07:00

OMG! I just got back results today...
I shan't talk much abt this cuz I'll probably make the whole post dull.
ok not that I failed.. But Im kinda lazy to take out stuff from my bag to post here...
and I tell u... My bag is messy..
U wanna know how messy it is?
its... MESSY
get it? ok...

I just can't get a conversation out of my head again...
ARGH!!!
This time I don't know if I should be happy or sad..
and erm.. this conversation was in Runescape with my friend...
and yes... he's a guy...
One line is one person talking..
first person talking is my fren..
whose name unfortunately escapes me...
and we were at the mines at that time..
(...) represent my thoughts at that time..

The (super interesting) convo:

Normally I would world jump to different worlds until I have 12 addy ores.
What made today so special? (I was expecting an ans like 'cuz i hav some1 2 talk 2 but he said)
I like the scenery. (I thought he was referring to the actual scenery)
Tch... I'm hurt. You hurt my feelings... *sniff (joking only la)
What? You don't like me looking at you?
~End~

the rest of the convo is not important...
BUT OMG!!! LOOK AT THE LAST SENTENCE!!!
the moment I saw that...
I could feel the heat rise to my cheeks...
and suddenly, i felt a warm blanket wrap around me...

OMG! but I dunno why my reaction was like that!!!!!!!!!
but I know he didn't mean it like a pervert would...
I mean... ARGH!!!!!! I DUNNO WHAT I WAS THINKING!!!
I guess I was deperate for attention that time...
but... but... I dun think that I should be acting that way!!!
Am I normal???
OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I feel like hiding my face...

I mean..
Its not that I don't like him.. but why am I acting like I like him... more than just a friend...
ARGH! BE REALISTIC!!!
I won't meet him in real life anyway..
will I? ARGH!!! SEE!!!!!!!!!!!
STOP IT AISHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Give me your views on this please...
and don't tease me!!! =(

Runescape!!!

2009-10-20T21:42:00.000-07:00

Went out with Sandra a few days ago... I think I shan't post it...
Go facebook and its self-explanatory(sp?)

kk... I started playing RS with Sandra a few days ago..
and yesterday rite...
got this one guy...
ok maybe 2 guys
they were annoyed...
Yok..something something( Let's just call him yo)
and Maxim 1000

its not that I purposely make them annoyed la
they just cannot tahan my hyperness
So they insulted me la...
Say I talk to much la...
and I annoying la...
And right after I logged of...
I asked Sandra to help me do some pay back
I couldn't be there cuz my father force me to sleep...

Their convo was something like this:

Wow I go away for one second and she’s gone
Y couldn’t she do that a long time ago
You mean sunfire?
Yeah.
Mmm.
Was I the only one annoyed?
Why the fuck are you announcing that to everyone? You’re the noob that has no life and thinks that everyone shouldn’t be lively cuz you have no balls to be "lively". Get a life please.
Fuck you
Mmmhmm. Interesting retort. Is that all you can come up with?
Didn’t mean annoyed in that way you idiot
Wtv. It’s insulting!
Fuck you. Wow thought u cared.
Wth is that all you guys can come up with? Fuck you? Go to urban dictionary if you really need to. It’s so sad. Really.

Den I think tht Maxim 1000 guy also said fuck you...

This is coming from me... Truly, sincerely, deep inside my heart..

Wah he srsly damn A-hole la pls... You look at his name...
Maxim eh...
U know wat tht is or not?
Porn magazine la! (how I know? They advertise it everywhere)
want to insult me look at your faults first.
think u so clean izzit?
innocent arh?
keep saying fuck you.
Seriously got no imagination.
no originality..
I also never insulted u right?
Shitass you u!
I was trying to be friendly..
u don't like u say u dont like arh
no need to insult right?
^%!@#&^%~*!&@^#!&^&^%~!!!
No balls to become a gentleman
A-hole!

ok so maybe my retort wasn't as good as Sandra's...
but its ok bah...
he was asking for it!
Stupid shitass...
I hope one day you shit comes out of your nose and mouth.

Yea..
This concludes today's post...
I shall go play rs with Sandra now...
Who wanna play with me can also!!!!
Talk to me on msn, yeah!

2009-10-17T06:11:00.001-07:00

HOORAY EXAMS ARE OVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and we can do whatever we like!!!

hmm... I like to go shopping...
But I should really cut down on my money-spending spree...

I HAVE A NEW FAVE COLOUR!!!
ITS YELLO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
without the 'W'
cuz it looks like jello...
which is a cool word xD

The viola lessons rite...
I'm willing to put it on hold...
Maybe I should concentrate on piano first..
I can always learn even when I'm an adult rite?
I think even if I do want to try...
I should probably rent one first..
but I've yet to find a suitable place to rent...

Theres a music shop at JURONG CC there..
the one with the huge library...
but I'm scared of judgemental eyes...
I don't like to be critisized..

oh well! Viola stuff will be on hold..
I shall concentrate on piano.
hiphiphoorayhiphiphoorayhiphiphooray
I have no idea what I'm cheering about..
but I feel happy..
for some unknown reason..
I hope u ppl feel happy too!!! :D

2009-10-13T00:57:00.000-07:00

again another very very quick post cuz exams not over yet...

I was entranced
by the viola....

I was listening to Distant Worlds:Final Fantasy Music...
and then my interest in in classical music grew and grew

I remembered hearing violins in the songs...
and that cause me to think about violas

I remembered the song in La Corda D'oro...
So I went to youtube and searched for violas

And I listened to it the whole day...

I may be thinking of playing viola...
I want to see how it goes first...
Cuz my progress with piano is like...
a standstill..
and I'm afraid if I tell my parents that I want to play viola,
they'll just scold me and say that I waste their money and don't practise often enough...
and they'll say that my interest will die soon

So, with the hari raya money, I'll keep it
and then maybe some how... in a few months maybe?
I'll try to convince them...
The timing must be perfect
or else my heart will be broken into a million pieces...

I'll go to the music shop at Causeway Point to ask abt the cost of the viola
and see if they have any lessons for beginners.
I've checked the internet too...
I think the cheapest one is about $250
And I think my duit raya is about near $300?

So I think I'll buy a cheaper one. Just in case my interest dies away
I HOPE NOT! TOUCH WOOD!!!

Next thing after that,
Is go to Yentl's house after the exams are over
and ask her to teach me how to play the violin
Although the 2 instruments look almost the same,
they are 2 completely different instruments
So I'll take a look... And it's nice to visit a friend sometimes rite?

I'm not sure how to break the news to my parents
because Sec 3 is gonna be a tough and trying year
so... it is likely that they won't support my decision.
But still, that won't stop me from trying.

The viola is the Queen of the strings. It's range is a metaphor for finding peace between two extremes , the violin and the cello. It illuminates my soul.

I want to change my life.
Starting with passion for music.
and discipline.

respect!

2009-10-03T00:35:00.001-07:00

This post is rated Teen for my colourful language.

I know it's during the exam period.

and I said that I wouldn't be posting till after exams.

But something happened to me earlier and I just had to post about this...

Scenario:

My father and me were at NTUC Fairprice in Lot 1. We were looking for some food items because there would be some guests who would be coming to our house and it would be sort of rude to not give then anything to eat. Therefore, I was following my father walk along one of the aisles and there was this uncle. No he should not be called uncle. Apek is a better word. So there was this apek who was walking behind me and I dunno why on that day my ankle was acting up again. Thus, I could not walk fast. So he was behind me. There was space beside me for him to walk past me. Guess what he did?

Answer:

He gave me the 'tsk' sound. You know the sound when you're pissed of? Something like clicking the tongue. but rather I think it was the sound when the inside of your mouth and tongue are very close. and then u suck in air? ok la. the 'tsk' sound! He did this 4 times and was still walking behind me.

How did I feel then?

I WAS DAMN PISSED!!!

Did he expect me to move for him?

Was he hinting to me that I'm slow and I was blocking the way?

Did he seriously expect me to make way for him when he could easily manoeuvre to the right and merrily go his way?

Who the fuck does he think he is?

Is he blind or dumb?

THERE WAS A HUGE SPACE FOR HIM TO OVERTAKE ME???

Was he that fat until cannot fit into the space?

Seriously

Tell me..

What kind of FUCKING ATTITUDE IS THAT?

I bet even people with higher authority would go through that space and over take me.

Wah seriously.. Apek with a fucked up attitude

ok I shall change his name to bastard.

a lazy, blind, dumb, conceited and fucked up bastard!

Honestly...

If I wasn't in my school uniform

and my father wasn't there,

I would have replied.

My reply:

What's your problem? Are you dumb or blind? Can you see that there is this Gi-normous space here for you to overtake me and go your merry way? Are you that fat that you can't walk here? but you don't look fat to me at all. Please la, you look average.Do u seriously think that I would move for you? Please get rid of that fucked up attitude.

And even if you wanted me to move, you could have said excuse me. BUT NOO! You gave me the 'tsk' sound instead! And u did it 4 times?

Please, do you have slow reaction... you have time to do that 4 times and u were so busy doing that that u didn't even see the space 'reserved' for you. So now that I've shown you the easier way to go where u want to, can you get the fucking way out of my sight!

~End of reply~

and after that incident, I was so absorbed in what just happened that I knocked into a salesgirl's box or something. How did I react?

AT LEAST I SAID SORRY!!!

I bet that bastard won't even look back!

AND WON'T EVEN APOLOGIZE!

even if he did look back, he would have given a stare at the salesgirl.

Wah dammit sial!

Apek tak sadar diri ke pe?

Merepek la.

Dah la tua. Nak bermegah-megah pulak.

Kau jage... Dapat balasan nanti satu hari.

Seriously, adults should take a look at themselves before talking bad about teenagers.

Please la. I wasn't doing anything wrong la please. And if you think I am, you should go drink out of the toilet bowl.

2009-09-28T01:36:00.000-07:00

HEY HEY HEY!!!
Exams are coming soon!

So I guess this will be my last post for a very very long time
(aiya as if I never post for a long time liddat)

I need to revise soon..
cuz need to act guai b4 father comes home!!!
hehe.. and need to revise la
which reminds me..
I very long nvr play piano already...

I think I'll practise tomoro...
hopefully...but 2moro should be a very busy day
cuz need to complete lit hw

To tell u the truth
I LOVE LITERATURE!!!
but I don't agree on the point about the teachers giving a specific
question and its answer..
and in the end we have to memorise the whole chunk of words!!!

Literature should be about expressing one's self

If we read a text.. (e.g Macbeth) Shouldn't we be given the liberty to make our own points to answer the teacher's questions?
Or is the education system in Singapore really stiff?
I believe that students should be given the chance to discuss some possible solutions to answer some questions pertaining Macbeth and such...
So, if I believe in all this, why am I not collaborating with the teachers?

The answer is simply because
I hate my Literature teacher.

she talks so over-confidently
she cracks lame joke tht the whole class will give her the wtf look...
she asks her students to do HER work
her actions tell me that she is totally heck-care abt our results and streaming
and worst of all

She bullies her students and is the most unreasonable person that I have ever come across in my entire life

K.. I shall not talk abt her anymore...

erm...
Just wanna wish everyone the best of luck for their exams!
yeah! GAMBATTE!!!

the world comes to life~

2009-09-19T05:29:00.001-07:00

Hello everyone!

Blogger is back to normal! hooray!

I have 2 things to blog about!

1st is revolver shoot

2nd is Hari raya

A few days ago I went to HTA for revolver shoot

I'm not sure if I got marksman score

but it was a good experience!

The recoil when u shoot the bullet was like damn...

OMG! SO COOL!!!!!

Senior Xin Yun and Adeline came to give us support

and they gave some of us some tips too!

and while marching to the shooting range,

I squad ic leh!

*eyebrows go up and down and up and down*

ok so nxt year will try my best to achieve marksman score!

and I would like to wish all my squadmates to gambatte too!

oh and 1 more thing!

I saw the cat when marching back to carpark

and the cat was the same cat tht I saw during NPAP trg

AND AND AND

the ppl who went for NPAP finally got the t-shirt!!!

OMG!!!! but its yellow in colour!

so ugly!!!! :(

aiyah nvm.. as long as its free hahahaha

2nd thing is hari raya!

I think I should do this post in malay cuz it sounds more natural tht way

sry if u don't understand

Selamat hari raya kepada semua umat Islam! Maaf zahir dan batin, salah silap dan terkasar bahasa

best seyh besok dah raye! boleh tidur lenyak sikit kan?

tak payah bangun syahur! huahuahua ;p

mcm mane korang? dah siap2 raye?

best kan? dapat glamour sikit. hahaha

besok aku akan pakai erm..2 inch heels

lepas tu nanti lebih tinggi daripada bapaku!

tapi kan... tak syoik tau

pasal kene focus on exams lagi

lepas tu.. u kinda get the worried feeling u know?
takpe lah

raye sikit2 bolehlah kan?

btul tak btul tak?

hehehe

haha. ok

I wanna do my own things now.

so byebye!

2009-09-07T19:59:00.000-07:00

OMG! I totally ditched my blog! Ok la nvm..
I'm back babeh! ._.
ok I shall nvr do tht again..

Anyways quick post b4 I go practice my piano
Its the September hols now..

I SHALL MAKE AN EFFORT TO NOT REVISE LAST MINUTE!!!!

HW I have is:
Maths 2 sets
English 2 sets
Chem 1 set
Physics 1 set( the other set is optional?!)

I've touched on Chem only
and its not even complete! O.O
OH, THE HORROR!!!

ok, Today I will start on PHYSICS!!!
no wait, I have to do proper filing first den I'll move on to physics!

ok ppl! wish me luck in my hw assignments! ;D

HAPPY 100th POST!

2009-08-14T18:37:00.000-07:00

yay! 100th post...
and I got something happy to blog about...

NEXT WEEK! GOT Sasuke vs. DEIDARA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SO HAPPY!!!!!!!!!!!
My fav char got some air time...yea yea yea!!!
And then got c2 dragon somemore...
cool eh?
OH YES!!!

eventhough I know he'll die in the fight..
I'll still root for him!
den then he'll take of his shirt!
and I'll have nosebleed...
o.o I sound very perverted now...
hahaha...but this is DEIDARA LEH!!!
like hello?

okok..yesterday got ICT..
den do marshalling..nothing much really..
but we wore gloves:)
but I felt extra yesterday...
yesterday damn scary...
I thought I lost my uniform cover...
but it was in the toilet!!!
I LEFT IT!!!
AIYA SO CARELESS!!!!!!!
nvm..I learned a lesson yesterday..

so here I am..FEELING EXCITED!
CUZ I CAN'T WAIT FOR NXT WEEK!!!!!!
YAY!!!!!!!!!!!! DEIDARA-KUN!!
AISHITERUYO!!!
heh..ok I'll shut up...
NOW!:)

2009-07-30T03:04:00.000-07:00

I totally forgot about my blog!
nvm...
Aiya i very bored now...
thursday is such a boring day...
Friday is such an interesting day...

2moro must meet senior to let her see the POP video thingy...
can you believe it?
next year...Sec 2s will become NCOs!!!
YAY!!!
I still have no idea what position I want...
I'm feeling ambitious...
Sec 3 NCO!
but den will be very very paiseh...

what about discipline mistress?
o.o
More paiseh...But kind of fun...can shout at people...
become ma'am's right-hand man!
hahaha

next year POP will be organised by Sec 2s '09!
I have a suggestion for the whole squad's contribution!
but shall go into details next year!

I dun't like H1N1
I hate H1N1
I despise H1N1
I loathe H1N1

Keep cancelling trainings! I super miss trgs lah!
Yesterday go Road Safety Park
the primary 5 kids are ssssoooooooooooo cuteeeeeeee!!!!!!!
Got 1 person say arh...
"I wan to pee larh!" the way the little boy say it is soooo cute

I really have no idea what to say now.....
so I shall end my blog post here!

2009-07-28T01:55:00.000-07:00

Very stress now...
Someone spoiled my mood early in the morning.
I have no idea what she said...
but I know it was something mean
if not why should I be angry with her?
I hate 2 ppl now...or maybe more...

It was destined anyway...
I can't run away from destiny
from fate...

But I.T made my day!
So FUN!
I almost finished my queen!
hehehe
all thats left is the king and the knight

Last period was spoiled again
because of a certain someone...
Why am I making enemies instead of friends?
Why am I not sociable?
damn those 2 ppl
I know I shouldn't be saying this...
but for all this time, I thought that they were admirable
but they showed me their true colours today...
I still don't get why they treat me this way...
What have I ever done to you?
Are you judging me because of my skin?
Why can't you critisize my character instead?
Why can't you say what you said behind my back straight into my face?
What am I to you?
A monster? A bitch? or a friend?

now I shall half-heartedly finish my homework before my father scolds me
and I become rebellious. And my mood tomoro will be totally ruined...

2009-07-18T22:51:00.000-07:00

Hello peeps!
I changed my blogskin yesterday...
and I'm updating today...
hahaha...
I was feeling sleepy after I changed blogskin...
do you like it?
The background nice?
I finally managed to get the 4 pics to move after i changed the music player...
WOW!
so happy!

Lyrics! a bit only..
No surprise:

chorus
It's no surprise I won't be here tomorrow
I can't believe that I stayed till today
Yeah you and I will be a tough act to follow
But I know in time we'll find this was no surprise

Last verse:
The kiss goodnight, it comes with me
Both wrong and right, our memories
The whispering before we sleep, just one more thing that you can't keep
Our favorite place we used to go
The warm embrace that no one knows
The loving look that's left your eyes
But I know in time we'll find this was no surprise

~~~
Nice rite?

ok...byebye~
;D

2009-07-18T04:59:00.000-07:00

HEY! sorry for not updating...busy with school and my personal life

today went to Funan centre the IT mall! I went with my dad
I can't even remember the last time we went shopping..
U know what I bought???
I bought some facial products, a cd and dvd!
I love Chris Daughtry! I mean his songs not him...
well I suppose I've become a fan after listening to his new album: "Leave This Town"
COOL!!!
and the dvd my dad bought is "Knowing". I haven't really watched it yet...
but I remember wanting to catch it in cinemas but didn't

I'm super happy that I bought Chris Daughtry's album!!!
Actually I wanted to buy Transformers:Revenge of the Fallen OST
but changed my mind..
Ashley Tisdale also got new album.. and on the cover...her hair was dyed RED!!!
actually it looked more like blonde with red highlights...
but the cover looked so bloody... o.o
I wanted to buy that too... but being a responsible and reasonable teen(-.-)
I just bought 1 album! The one who paid for it was my dad anyway...
:D

After shopping there went to eat... at somewhere near golden mile shopping centre
tht place is famous for erm... "tulang' in malay
I think that place is also called the Army Market
hahaha..cuz got a lot of police and army stuff...
AND I BOUGHT A T-SHIRT!!!
Police one erh... got the logo... the police logo!
cool la~~~
its black in colour and the material is dri-fit!
sooo happy~~~

hehe...ok I guess I better get back to my homework now...
BYEBYE!

2009-07-06T05:24:00.002-07:00

HELLO EVERYBODY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11
I MISSED YOU!!!!
DID YOU MISS ME???
I KNOW U DID!!!
some ppl have gone crazy on my tagboard already....
haha jkjk :)

Yesterday went to lot 1 and watch Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen...
COOL LA!!!!
hahaha good thing my ears didnt burst
the sound was dolby digital...
I was hoping for dts...

and I downloaded the ending theme "New divide" by linkin park
The song quite nice...
I think I shall try to play it on my guitar...
if i have time...
The intro is nice u know???

and so...

I GOT FF VIII ON MY PSP!!!
YAY!! YAY!! YAY!! YAY!! YAY!!
and I'm posting this to make someone jealous...
cuz he dun hav the game on his psp...
HAHA!
IN YOUR FACE!!!
nolarr
dun go emo like...
an emo person?

SQUALL LEONHART!!!
RINOA HEARTLILY!!!
gd couple =D

THANK YOU YENTL!!!!!!!!!!
but the game keep hanging...
and den need to off...
start at last saving point
AHHH!!!
Its driving me insane...

ok I think I better go now...

P.S. if you think u look like Squall, pls don't flatter yourself

MUST GET READY!!!

2009-06-18T22:50:00.001-07:00

Event: Sec 4s Passing Out Parade

Time: 26 June 09, 5.30 pm

Place: Art Room

Sec 2s performance comprises of:

singing Graduation (Friends Forever) by Vitamin C

presenting a video

and a cake for the all the NCOs

For those of you who didn't go for the training on 19.6.09

-We grouped you guys into 4 groups

and made started making the video(which I dunno is abt what)

Next trg will be on 22.6.09

-Practice the song and record the video

please bring your own lyrics

the song has to be 75% complete and satisfactory

-the footage for the video has to be 100% recorded

and then someone will edit

there will be 2 shifts

morning shift is 10am-11.30am

afternoon shift is 12pm-1.30pm
choose when you can go

Be sure to attend the trg cause if you don't

We'll have extra trg on 23.6.09

and if your performance during this trg is not satisfactory...

extra trg on 23.6.09

wahahaha...

If there is a need, on 23.6.09:

-song must be completed

-video should be finished being edited and passed to seniors

time to be confirmed again

SO EVERYTHING MUST BE FINISHED ON 23.6.09!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So thats the your training dates and agendas...

Now your more details for the song, video, and cake!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Song:

Graduation (Friends Forever) by Vitamin C

MUST BRING YOUR OWN LYRICS ON 22.6.09

This is the groups that we seperated you guys in...

CANNOT CHANGE!

and the reason for seperating you guys is this:

This is the order of which group will sing

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Video:

We've started making the video...

But I have no idea what it is abt..

must ask Eric or Zhi Chao or Ting Jie

recording should be finished by 22.6.09

Some ppl will be doing it..

while the rest of the squad practice singing

Finished editing on 23.6.09

passed to seniors on 23.6.09

I got recordings of the 50th Anniversary at HTA!

you want to add?

Do you want to use handphone to record or an old video camera?

haha..reply on the tagboard

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Cake:
Izzati is in charge...

should be done on 24.6.09!

cannot make it on the day itself

cuz.. if screw up den...

DIE!!!!!!

Make the cake in the home econs room!

I think chocolate cake...

Ask Izzati ok?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Did I miss out anything?

any qns sms or call or tag!

Archery!!

2009-06-16T01:23:00.000-07:00

came back from NPCC at school just now...
got archery enrichment course you know?

DAMN FUN I TELL YOU!
the shooting the arrow gives you some kind of adrenaline...
and DAMN
ITS GOOD!

the first time I wanted to release the arrow like very paiseh...
but den ok la
sadly..I didn't get to hit the balloons..
but I hit the x though..

saddened..
archery over already...
I wanna play some more lah..
but den the weather was quite warm just now..
and the wind was troublesome to deal with..
cuz they keep making the balloons fly around and move!

I hit quite near the balloons...
but den not direct hit..
ahh
sad..
got someone shoot the arrow...
den actually hit the balloon...
but den it bounce back!
den drop on the floor...
HAHAHAHAA
its like..
so funny...
and like... defy physics like dat...
wow...
o.o

Enrichment courses are damn fun!
I wonder what we're having for the Sec 2 enrichment...
REVOLVERS???
ooooo... Hopefully...
must be fun

ok lah
I tired already
I want to take a nap...
byebye!

2009-06-14T07:34:00.000-07:00

I forgot that the main purpose of posting the previous post
was to blog about the trip to malaysia yesterday...

neh mind...
I shall post AGAIN!
ya I know...
so boring ryte...
cuz I nothing to do...
so I post la...

Yesterday go Malaysia to cut and wash hair...
wow Aishah goes to Malaysia to cut and wash her hair...
what a waste of time...
I know thats wat you're thinking but actually there were a few other reasons
and well since my "hair salon" was nearby...
and my hair was already ridiculously thick..
so cut and wash!
the the cutting part...
cut until short...
and i dunno how to tie my hair to school now...
its short...
but not that short...
cuz can still tie up...
with some difficulty

so er...
after that went to eat...
so hungry
cuz didn't eat breakfast that morning..
after that go shopping...
den went back home...

no need for the details there..
cuz nothing interesting?

and I found a new jap song
super nice laaaaaaaa
actually the song is ok
but the voices are nice!
Its 11pm now...
I should go

byebye!

Geisha

2009-06-14T07:03:00.000-07:00

OOOOOOO...
I just watched memoirs of a geisha just now..
IN TRUE HD!

It was quite nice...
but I expected more dancing from the movie?
u know the fans?
very nice!
and the round paper umbrella
can be used for dance
I WAS EXPECTING MORE OF THAT!

ahh...but nehminds...
the ending was ok la...
but left me a bit confused...

I wanna read the book!
to understand more..

now I feel sad...
so sad...

blue eyes
blink
blink

yeah that was supposed to be random...
I think I should go now...
Memoirs of a geisha
is sooooo worth watching!!

ok bye!

2009-06-10T21:59:00.000-07:00

eh...
It's been a long time since I updated..

eh..
I dunno wat to talk abt...
oh ya! erm...yesterday practice guitar until fingers pain...
When you're gone rite...
got B MINOR!!
OMG!!
thats like super hard to play...
and I bought a capo and tuner for my guitar!
the capo is like... o.o
super hard to fix it on the fret....

Holidays are boring...
can't wait for nxt wk
GOT MORE ACTIVITIES U KNOWW?
P-O-P-oh! yea and archery...
after archery got tuition!
ahhhhh!!
nvm..I shall endure...
haha
I think i should do my homework now...
byebye!

2009-06-04T23:55:00.000-07:00

I really hate some people....
really...they are seriously damn irritating...
ARGH...
I fled straight home after training...

pathetic la...
den today wanted to go to library...
den along the way...
sprained my ankle...
STUPID SIA!!
den the place whr i sprained my ankle was quite near to my house..
so went back...

AHHHHHHHHHHh!!!!!!!!!!!
ok so...ya...I THINK I SHOULD DOWNLOAD WINRAR!
ok random...
byee

THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-06-02T00:11:00.000-07:00

2dae went to school...
den my mum talk to the teacher-in-charge for the oral..
den she say I will take the exam in September!!
YES!!!

so now I shall focus on getting better...
and do something productive over the holidays...

some random things:
the Gundam Seed machines are cool!!! I may try drawing them...
OH SHIT! I haven't started drawing Yentl's Neji...

I suddenly want to read Shakespeare's works...
._.

and ace-learning! arh...damn it!
should get started...now....
to take some load off my back

so byebye!
Can't wait for GOH trg on 4th and 5th!

2009-05-31T07:18:00.000-07:00

2nd post of the day...
I'm like super duper freakking bored...
I shall tell you what I feel like now...

My throat is like...
ARGHHHHH!!
pain...
and why is my tongue numb?
I scared for my oral laaaaa!!!!!!!!!!
WHY THEY CHANGE THE DATES???

and my voice ryte...
if you heard my voice now...
you would think that I'm a monster...
so right now...
I'm the person who holds the record for the lowest/deepest voice
IN SINGAPORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ahhh.......so bored ryte now...
2nd June
2nd June
2nd June
must get well soon...